


Haunted Castle

by mimid



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Dirty Jokes, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Halloween, Horror, M/M, One Shot, Suggestive Themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-14 00:07:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16482335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimid/pseuds/mimid
Summary: The mercs have a needed pause from the Robot War. Soldier informs to Demoman that the Wizard isn't in the castle, which gives the second an idea. (Mostly fixed, it seems.)





	Haunted Castle

Everything seemed lost after the the addition of the Robot Engineer to the waves of robots, making fighting the pieces of metal more a pain in the ass than before, and also caused that Soldier couldn't infiltrate anymore in Gray Gravel Co. (Soldier was right!) therefore they are not being able to know where and when they will attack anymore. Despite all of that, the team somehow is still standing, defending what remains of Mann Co, but they were forced to yield more ground to Gray’s robots.

A week and a half for Halloween, the mercs were waiting in Coal Town for a call from Miss Pauling, to have new instructions. When she called, Engie answered the phone, not letting Scout to. She informed to the team that there is no Mann Co. facility to defend at the moment: The robots need time to be made after all. That, or Gray is probably planning something big. It could both be the right answers.

Taking the risk, the mercenaries decided to leave the abandoned town to their places, ready to reunite again whenever the Robot Wars resumes. They need to have some rest. If nothing happen before Halloween, they will reunite again anyway close to the date, in the very exact place they were standing. At this point, aside from having an annual Halloween Party, they've assumed they will need to fight the new disaster Merasmus brings with himself every year, including Monoculos most of the time. Although, this year Medic hasn't gave a new eye to Demoman. 

After defeating the flying eye for the first time, Monoculos didn't appeared again until Medic implanted afresh a new goddamn eye in Demo's eye-socket, which Demo has asked several times after, every single time, despite all the problems.

 _I want me eye back, but not like that: I want it to stay in my damn eye socket,_ thinks to himself, for now. He eventually will ask to Medic a new eye, again. But what most torments him right now is the week and a half with no job. A week in a half of his mother screaming at him.

A week in a half without seeing his friends.

But wait, it doesn't has to be like that. Most of them probably won't want to deal with their coworkers in their free time, except for Soldier, his best friend, and Scout, who…

 _The castle_. That fucking castle is so damn close. It moved from his mother country to the United States of America (Unbelievable!) If he wanted, he could explode it and then it would be no stone left over stone. But: 1. His best friend lives there, with the Wizard, because Soldier somehow is his familiar. It has been told to him in the past an explanation, that he has already forgot and doesn't really want to understand anyway; 2. The Wizard already gives them enough problems every year (It's actually Soldier's fault, almost always, but Demo will omit this detail on purpose); 3. He hold little to no grudge. Since he fights Merasmus with his team, he has tried so many times to settle his business with the magician, with no satisfactory results. His eye hasn't come back to his cursed eye socket—More exactly, stay there, as mentioned before—, the Wizard says it supposedly can't uncurse it, and _the motherfucker won't actually die_ , no matter how many times they kill him. Although, beating him up is still joyful, and if that book was in his hands again...

“Soldier!” Jane was leaving.

“Demo,” he responds.

“Ye were leaving without me.” Demo would have made a joke about Soldier being a bad friend for that, if Soldier weren't too literal. Plus, it isn’t like they haven't had fights before. Ugly fights.

“I'm sorry Demo. I was distracted.” He's frowning.

Demo feels like he's the bad friend. Of course Soldier is sad about not having to fight the robots, and also not working to with his friends for a while.

“What yer gonna do now?”

“I'm going back to the castle.”

“Didnae the wizard throw you out?” He remembers now.

“Merasmus is in jail”

_Merasmus what._

This is, this is actually… Perfect. He has a new job to brag to his mum, if he can convince Soldier. He can imagine a line with families waiting in from of the castle and cash packages in his hands. He can even hear the screams of terror...

“Demo, why are you smiling?”

 

 

The castle makes him feel uneasy. It would make him feel worse if wasn't for Soldier living there, after breaking inside. Besides the entrance, the path to the library and the library itself, he never saw more indoor of the eldritch castle, that luckily it is not so big after all.

_“This is a Eldritch Castle of Dark Magicke! Not a pancake house!”_

Demoman shivers. For a second, he sees himself as a kid in front of him. He shakes his head and the vision is gone.

If he can't have his eye back, he can take the Wizard place into a stupid attraction and gain money at his expense. Merasmus never gave him his nickel after all.

The castle is messier than what he remembers. The books not only have powder, they are all over the place. That, without counting all of the things Soldier has done, starting for the fridge in the front and the raccoons. Soldier even said something about a bathroom in the kitchen that Demo wants to imagine that it isn't something as bad as he thinks, so is going to be one of the last thing we will dealt with.

He will start from where everything started for him, the mentioned library. He even asked Soldier to be alone, so he could confront his past alone, rejecting the offering of Soldier of confront it together. Although, his past was being bitten by raccoons in the front instead of being in the library. He’s still thinking what to do with the goddamn book.

For now, his plan is, starting from there, cleaning and tidy up the castle just enough to be decent but still look spookier for the public, which would require a lot of work. After that, see what he can do about the raccoons, already knowing that can't be much. From there, the little to nothing possessions of Soldier can be put together in his habitation easily, with a big “ **DO NOT ENTER** ” sign in the door that Soldier himself will do. The other problem...

He has nothing to fear. He just need to ignore the ghosts that are trying to talk to him. Despite he didn't saw them back then, they must remember him.

 

 

Spy is standing in front of Demo, who's in front an ancient lectern that definitely shouldn't be outside the castle. At least he's not using the semi-buried fridge where Scout and Soldier are talking next. Demo didn't bothered to dig it up, and Soldier told him to not anyway.

It took way longer to prepare the place, and Demo has less than a week to pull out the rest of his plan, that's beginning to look stupier and stupier than before, but he's too sunk in his idea, and has working hard that it can't be for nothing. All of that without counting on his pride: He will not admit he has wasting all his time and energy he could've used in something else.

“So, like an actually haunted house, right?” asks Spy. At their side, Scout is insisting to open the fridge. Soldier isn't happy about the idea.

“Yes. Legally a Raccoon Sanctuary, but, yes,” Demoman answers back, ignoring what was going on next to the ruined appliance on purpose. The place being a sanctuary means that it's illegal to charge for entering the place, but as long the no one of the government find it out, they are fine.

Demo has a little hoarse. Spy looks at Soldier and Scout discussing. Is likely Demo spent the last night with Soldier...

“Then you didn't have to do anything to the castle,” replies while connecting the dots in his mind.

“What?! You call nothin' to clean the entire castle?!”

“But it's a haunted house,” he interrupts, _“Why would you—?”_

“Castle,” he corrects. “Soldier lives here.” Cleaning the bathroom he made in the kitchen wasn't a good experience.

“Oh.” That kind of mess. “Proceed.”

“Stop interrupting me!” He's altered. “Where I was—? Oh I remember: I fought raccoons to take space from part of their territory!”

“So there is still raccoons inside.”

“Of course there is: Is their castle too, _and sanctuary!_ You're not listening!”

“Will you ask to the public if they are vaccinated against rabies?”

“Fuck off,” curses in a low tone, annoyed, and then changes the subject, talking again with his usual tone: “I'd to dealt with ghosts there too.”

“And I'm very sure that at this point you are used to them.”

_“What are you doing in this miserable place? Are you here to lose your **other** eye, kid?”_

“No I don't... Spy.” Hates to admit it, but it's the damn true. “Are ye goin' in or not?”

“What you did with the book?”

“With what?” didn't listen.

“The bombinomicon.”

“Oh,” he looks way too calm about it to Spy, “ _Him_. He's on the roof.”

_No way._

“HEY! HEEEY! BUDDY IT'S ME!” screams at Spy, who can't even see him. The talking book sounds weirdly distressed compared to the way he commonly talk. “WHY YOU DON'T COME HERE AND HELP ME—”

“SHUP, UUUPP!” Demo screams back. Then start coughing.

The few people that got in the line after Spy leave, and luckily Demo didn't noticed them before and neither when they left.

So that's why he's hoarse. A boring answer. Then, how he convinced Soldier for this stupid idea...? Maybe is still the same answer as before.

“Are ye goin' in, or not?” says again as a murmur, still short of breath.

“Of course not,” says with a smirk, finally leaving the line.

Demo grunts.

_Ye were killing my nerves on purpose, ye damn snake._

“Fuck you Spy,” says low but firm, pointing at his coworker while bending towards him. Then he turns in the direction of where Soldier and Scout are arguing. “What about you, Scout?” asks with a smile and exaggerated voice, almost like he was actually talking to a kid. “Are ye goin' inside the Wizard castle?”

“Me? Of course I will!” enthusiastically exclaims in response.

“Scout, no.” Spy's smirk is gone.

“What are you gonna do about that?” Scout asks defiantly.

“Scout go to the line,” interrupts Demoman.

“What? But I'm your friend!”

“Go to the line, Scout!” demands Soldier.

“Alright, FINE.”

Scout get in the line. He sees Spy pausing behind him.

“What?! Are you freaking kidding me?”

Demo is the one laughing at Spy now, just like the old saying.

“Why you guys don't give a personal tour to your friends?” asks Scout, who has zero patience waiting in lines, even if he is the first and there is no more people behind him and Spy. He is right tho, who knows how long it would take to finally form a group of people.

“That's… that's actually not a bad idea.”

“Of course not!” responds quickly, offended. All of his ideas are great.

“Soldier! Show Scout and Spy the castle! I mean, guide them.”

Soldier is surprisingly quiet. Signs to his coworkers to follow him. He never liked this idea, didn't he?

“What, him?” asks Scout incredulous while pointing at Soldier.

“Aye. Who's gonna wait here for the new clients?”

_Oh no._

 

 

They haven't even reach any place of the castle in particular and something is already stopping them.

“Move up!” yells Soldier to Scout and Spy in front of him. They were following Soldier at first but they walked faster and passed him.

“Soldier, move the raccoons first.”

A raccoons is snarling to both mercenaries.

“Are you really afraid of this, Spy?” asks Scout, disguising his own fear.

“Rabies, Scout.”

“ _Oh_.” Hoooly fuck. “Soldier—”

Soldier pushes Scout away in his way to the animal. He takes the raccoon in his arms.

“Hello, Lieutenant Bites!” exclaims caressing the wild animal, that keeps snarling, showing all of their teeths. “Say hello to Lieutenant Bites!” demands to his teammates while turning around to see them.

“No.” Both reply in unison.

“I said…”

“Ah, fine,” Scout surrenders, knowing how is Soldier. “Hello Lieu-whatever Bites!”

“Spy.”

“I won't say 'Hi' to an animal Soldier.”

“Oh common Spy you know how Sol—”

Lieutenant Bites suddenly jumps towards Spy—He will not accept this kind of disrespect. Spy tries to defend himself but the raccoon bites his right hand fingers, to immediately left the site after that. All of this happen while he and Scout scream with all their lungs, and Soldier does nothing besides watch.

Demo listen the screams from outside. That should be normal in this context, so he decides to ignore them.

With his handkerchief Spy bandages his wounded hand. He will need to ask Medic for a rabies vaccine, and take care of Medic not injecting him with anything else that does not is the vaccine, each one of the following doses.

“I want to leave.”

“Really? We haven't seen anything!” responds Scout, who was just laughing at expense of Spy after calming down from the scare.

“We are going to the library,” says Soldier.

“Isn't there where Demo lost his eye?,” asks Scout.

“Yes,” answers without enthusiasm.

“After seeing the library I will leave with or without you, Scout.” says Spy, knowing that the dangerous book is on the roof.

In the library, there's almost no powder in there, due to Demo's work. Besides that, Demo has left spider webs on purpose, and he didn't bother to pick up all of the books from the floor. What a shame.

Spy crouches down to pick one of the books. When he's about to touch it, Soldier interrupts what he's doing.

“DO NOT TOUCH THAT BOOK,” shouts Soldier, like the world depended on that.

“Or what? It's just a book,” says, lifting his shoulders and facing his palms up, outraged.

“Do you think that that is not menacing enough?!”

“It's a book, Soldier! _This is not more dangerous than your raccoons!_ ”

Spy lifts the book from the floor, with the same hand where he was bitted. For doing what he wanted without thinking it too much, to bother Soldier, he stains the book's pages with a tiny drop of blood from his improvised bandage. He curses inwardly because of his own disregard.

The book starts to trembling.

Spy drops it immediately. He after starts walking backward from it.

“Ha! A book scared you, Spy!” mocks Scout.

“Shut up. Something is wrong.”

“I told you,” says Soldier.

The book opens violently, coming a beam of dark light that forms a pilar that goes all the way to the ceiling from it. The three mercs freeze in their places, terrified, waiting from what's next.

Them, two solid black hands with claws split the beam in two.

As soon Scout sees that, he does a high pitch scream and then immediately runs outside the library, not from were they came, technically losing himself in the castle. He will not wait to see what is going to happen: That has to be a demon.

Demo, recognizing that was Scout who screamed, still decides to not move from his place. The clients might arrive, soon or later.

Meanwhile, Spy and Soldier still frozen in their places, both see how as the beam disappears a large figure comes from it. It has horns, and two yellow shining eyes with no pupils. Then, eyes in all their body.

Soldier and Spy finally start screaming, giving probably one of their more terrified screams of their lives.

Demo hear their screams. “Bloody hell!” He can't keep ignoring this, and goes inside the castle, running.

As he finish his scream, Soldier goes to one of the bookshell behind Spy and that thing, looking for something, while repeating to himself “I got this, I got this, I got this…”

“DO NOT LEAVE ME!” begs Spy, while taking out his gun from his clothes.

On other the other hand, escaping from the library through one of hallways, Scout stops at a door with a bit sign. It says “ **DO NOT… ENTER** ,” which to him means that _he has_ to enter. The sign has captivated his attention and he has completely forgotten from his recent memory that he was just running away of a freakin' demon seconds ago. He keeps reading. Under the big letters, in small ones, it says: “Soldier's room.”

He must, enter.

Meanwhile, Spy is shooting at the beast in vain with his revolver. The bullets hit booksellers, the floor, the chandelier, but the demon do not even flinch. They're even laughing.

“This is how you receive me? You freed me, mortal!”

The monster begins to walk towards Spy, who walks backwards in response.

“Soldier what are you doing?! Come here and HELP ME!”

“I can't find it!”

“What are you looking for?! Look for that later!”

“THIS!”

Laughing like a maniac, Soldier runs and goes in between Spy and the demon. Spy hasn't see what Soldier has in his hands.

“What are you doing?!” Spy is almost sure that Soldier is going to undress or some kind of similar idiotecy.

“If that what I think…?” asks the demon, who starts to walk backward themself. “Look, we can talk about this…”

“Have a talk with this and go back to HELL!”

Soldier opens a tiny bottle with transparent liquid. Before the demon could escape, Soldier spill the content in the creature, who screams in pain as melts in the floor while twitching, trying to resist their dead, until it disappears completely.

“That, that was…?”

“Holy water!” responds as nothing has happened. “Where's Scout? That coward...”

 

 

Demo reaches the library. They are not there but he still can hear screams.

“This is MY room!”

_Oh shite._

When he reaches Soldier's room, he helps Spy to separate Soldier hands from Scout's neck.

Soldier violently pushes to the ground the stuff placed in his bed. Then pickups them again, starting by his shovel.

“I think we can walk outside for ourselves,” says Spy. “Good luck with him,” adds on sotto to Demo, before leaving with a coughing Scout.

Soldier is making a conscious effort to control himself. His red face, exaggerated breathing, and his piercing look everytime he looks at Demo, gives him away, but he's not saying or yelling anything.

He had accepted Demo's idea expecting to the robots to attack before, making everything Demo would've done for nothing, and not actually having to interrupt his routine with some kind of Merasmus bullshit (It did not sounded so bad at first, though). After all, they would have expend that time together, or at least that was he thought: Demo was frantically cleaning, which resulted in him being completely exhausted at the end of the day. It was almost the same of being alone, he even went some nights to sleep in his own place—which is understable, he has a mom to care of.

Soldier could've said something before, but, shitty time with his friend was better than nothing, and, even if the idea was awful...

Demo just waits. He has already fuck up everything, and trying to talk immediately to Soldier would mean an ugly fight for sure. He perfectly knows they’re going to fight anyway, but between going to fists or only screaming, he clearly has a preference, and it seems his friend too (that would surprise Spy). He has to apologize, but when his friend has calmed down a bit, not before.

_This wouldn't have happened if wasn't for me being an inconsiderate, headstrong, idiot._

Soldier finally sits in a side of his bed. He bends down and support his elbows in his legs. With his fingers intertwined, rests his face in his hands, covering his mouth. Gives a new look to Demo: He's frowning again.

“You never liked my idea,” says Demo, impulsively, resting in the casing of the door. He should has _apologize_ first, but his pride and impulsiveness betrays him.

“No, I didn't.”

“I'm sorry—”

“But I didn't told you,” interrupts, then looks at the ground and sniff.

God. He still should be mad—like how he expected—not, sad.

“And I didnae asked ye again to be sure. This is my fault, lad. Please don't be sad...”

Demo carefully goes there, and sits at Soldier left side. In that way, Demo can see clearly Soldier's face with his good and only eye.

“It wasn't a bad idea, it just…” Still looking at the floor.

“It was a bad idea, and ye didnae liked it. It's okay.” Demo caresses Soldier back.

“But it was _your_ idea.”

His best friend idea, he _must_ like it. That's how he understand friendship and _devotion_. Besides, Demo can be really passionate about his ideas and talking about what he loves. He can convince Soldier of anything, for good or for bad. Mostly for good, but Demo can be inconsiderate at times if is blinded by his own ideas and will, like in this case.

“I'm sorry my friend.” Demo wraps his arm around Soldier, and rests his chin on Soldier's left shoulder.

The last thing Demo wants is hurting his friend. Doing that by accident makes him feels sordid. Who would want to hurt Soldier? He hasn't never done anything wrong… Except, several things, several times, all of his adult life.

“Are you staying tonight, Tavish?”

“Lemme call my mum.” The public phone is one block from the castle.

Demo already told his mother he's not sleeping in their home, but he doesn't remember. He anyway would want to verify if she's okay, and tell her good night.

Soldier grabs Demo's right forearm. He gazes directly at his friend eye.

“I'll call her later.”

He has neglected his friend for too long.

1, 2, 3 and more kisses, the way Soldier is sitting gives Demo an idea. Demo crouches in front of him, while caresses both sides of Soldier body with both hands in their way to his friend crotch.

“Wait.”

“What?”

“You're doing this to apologize?”

“No.” The real answer is obviously yes, but he also wants this.

“Mmm,” he's not sure if believing Demo. Whether is true or not, he says: “You haven't kissed me enough.”

Soldier is a man who know his needs, and knows they haven't had enough foreplay for his taste, which is also boring. He grabs Demo by his chin. Demo gets a little embarrassed and looks away, but smiling.

“Also, I still have my clothes on,” Jane adds.

“Well…”

 

 

The next day, after having lunch together with the raccoons, Demo announced that he can't stay for any longer. The war against the robots can continue at any given moment and he needs to use part of his time taking care of his mother. She can do well alone, but nothing takes away that she's old and also blind. The few times he has hired maids she has made them renounce.

Aside from that, the castle still makes him uneasy, even with Soldier around. Staying there close to the anniversary of losing his eye as a child doesn't seems like a good idea. It comforts him that the book is in the roof, and even if Soldier throw him down, he would not take care of him.

“You can visit me if you promise to not fight with my mum.”

“I… I should stay in the castle by this time of the year. You know, matter of ghosts and Merasmus isn't here.”

“I got it.”

Both know Soldier can't promise not fight with Demo's mother. What for Soldier is just a fact, for Demo means that Soldier not only would not change, it reminds him that this old man _can't_ change. This is the way he is: It would even be cruel demanding him to be different.

Soldier walks Demo to the street. They hug each other effusively and pat their backs.

“Tell me when the Wizard is back from jail, will ya? I've to throw a bottle between his eyes!”

“I will! I want to be there to see that!” replies excited, waving bye to Demo.

“You will my friend!” Demo says while waving bye to Soldier.

No Wizard. Who knows is this Halloween is going to finally be nice a Halloween. But the thing Soldier said about the ghosts of the Mann brothers visiting him and leaving before an exorcism can't be a good omen.

“Wait!”.

Demo turns around.

“Merasmus doesn't live here anymore.”

“Yes, he's in jail,” Demo replies confused. “You already told me that.”

“He got evicted from the castle. The castle is mine now.”

“What.”

“The castle—”

“I did hear you," Demo interrupts. "You didn't told me that before!” Soldier only explained the thing about being a ranger of the sanctuary.

“I'm sorry.”

“Don't worry. Maybe not this year, but I'm sure the next Halloween he will appear to ruin the team party… and I'll throw a bottle between his damn eyes!”

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween! Incoherent stuff about this dumb fic below (Btw, If you're reading this: Thank you! I hope this fic isn't too bad):
> 
> I'm assuming the brothers visited Soldier right after they were murderer (Grave Matters). After this, at least in in-game canon, "Helltower" would happen, and next to that Manhattan and the Rottenburg missions (Two cities update).
> 
> The “tour” and other stuff should has been longer and detailed but aaaahh, fuck it, will be rushed forever.
> 
> I was anticlimactic about the bombinomicon on purpose. Just throw him faraway!
> 
> I reference "[The Teufort Horror](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8651384/1/The-Teufort-Horror)," than if you clicked, it seems it's gone. I can't find it someone else, I hope someone archived it. (In case someone find it: 1. It's quite explicit [gore]; 2. Tell me please). Edit: **[here](http://tf2chan.net/fanfic/res/4183.html)**.


End file.
